Sonnet Reviews

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Girls, Blinkbox

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I got this wrong. I saw the first short scene

Some months ago & found nothing to like:

Neither the spoilt lead girl, nor her soft/mean

Parents. I turned it off with no small spite.

I got it wrong. Although in its second

Year it trundles into rom-commery,

With Adam’s midnight dash, & some odd

Plotting, the first is some brave comedy,

As everybody told me & I did not

Well hear. For I was wrong. It’s important,

I think, an important show, one that

Every boy should be shown. Although scant

Attention has been paid to the way

It in detail does nail our post-crash days.

(Source: feministfatale.com)

The Social Network, dir. David Fincher

Right now, James Salter, octogenarian

Noveliser, is quizzed on ‘Great Gatsby’.

He pauses, reflects, & says that the Daisy-

Tale is not ‘quite that book’, the nation-

Defining tale of the lone American

Soul. He refers to ‘Sawyer’, to ‘Moby

Dick’, as novels that once the heavy

Burden bore of that elucidation.

The yanks I’ve known have only once

Or twice struck me as ‘Gatsby’-folk:

As often, per-capita, as my Brits

Have chased glitter to sad exuberance.

They meet in this, the great books, the thought provoke:

They chase the whale: that’s their & our one myth.

(Source: digitalcameraworld.com)

The Ballad of the Genius Bar, Part 2

I

He packed once more his broken thing

            & strolled into the town

Made his way to Apple Store

            Where t-shirts they did frown.

II

‘What is it that you want from us,

            ‘Who comes lacking appointment?’

Though highly trained they gave the stench

            Of IT disappointment.

III

‘From Android phone I did not see

            ‘Booking was necessary

‘But this is my sole work machine,

             ‘Excuse the rule’ – his plea.

IV

‘Away! Away! Avaunt, we say!

            ‘For we’re not close to ready,

‘Come back upon the morrow’s dawn

            ‘When store’s more clearly busy.’

V

So ignobly closed his first assay

            In retreat upon the metro,

& so he slunk all web-deprived

            Onto his seat at home.

VI

Where he faced the real horror

            Of giving full attention,

 To the shows oft lost to surf

            Upon his television.

The Ballad of the Genius Bar, part 1

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I

It was an early evening

                In the merry month of May

When our hero’s MacBook screen

                Contrived to lose its way.

II

He was not throwing it around

                It was not at all unstable,

It was sitting there quite flat

                Before him on the table.

III

He leapt towards his Android phone

                Typed quickly into Google

“My MacBook’s screen is black as pitch:

                Though machine’s still bootable.”

IV

As he awaited phone’s response

                His mind sought guiltily

For what he’d done to break the thing

                In its short history.

V

He recalled his habit, which he’d

                Prefer he hadn’t had,

Of shoving his packed lunch into

                His oe’rfilled laptop bag.

VI

He also found him guilty of

                Being somewhat cavalier,

In placing it around the house

                When iPlayering with the gear.

VII

A dread partic’lar incident

                Was one that touched him more,

When Orpheus had taken him

                & thrown it to the floor.

VIII

But when his websearch did return

                A sheaf of information,

He saw scenarios much worse

                Than those in ’s imagination.

IX

He saw six hundred message boards

                Of seething discontent,

Filled with sixty thousand

                Power-using malcontents

X

Who spoke angrily of flimsiness

                In Apple’s product lines,

Of poor customer service

                & extensive waiting times.

XI

They spoke of Nvidia issues

                & outdated guarantees,

Of tricky manoeuvring

                To evade warrantees.

XII

& when he came to word of costs

                If this problem was found,

He did exclaim ‘Oh no! Oh Lord!

                ‘Not seven hundred pounds!’

XIII

Our chap felt a sinking feeling

                He came over very tense

He did regret his lack of nous

                When it came to maintenance.

XIV

“If only I had done a course

                In computerology,

Instead of wasting all that time

                On my English Lit degree.”

Noises Off, Newcastle Theatre Royal, April 2013

Often I go alone because the stress

Involved in picking out a show, having

Others pay to support my choice, is less

Easy to bear than the stigmatizing

Effect of lone attendance, which is

Anyway slight. A rare venture, birthday

Party theatre, but having once seen this

Some years before I was able to say:

‘It hurt me with the laughter by the end’.

The longer it went on though… By Act Two,

The confusing back-stage section, I send

A search party for the laughs: Where? From whom?

Thankfully answered within Act Three,

Which is where big laughs should really be.

(Source: mycroft-brolly.livejournal.com)

Thor, dir. Kenneth Branagh; Captain America: The First Avenger, dir. Joe Johnston

Of the thoughtless film clichés that annoy

The spontaneous round of applause is

That which at soul most dreadfully itches,

Having passed from fiction to world’s employ:

We did not clap any shite in my altar-boy

Days. Second worst, at play in ‘Thor’: extras

Who overreact to fancy dress; embarrass –

ment the right response, not fear unalloyed.

Better, then, ‘Cap’, whose costume at first

Is for marketing & ridicule.

Both final reels reflect the core problem

Of Marvel’s filmic thing: that the worst

Part is the climax: but ‘Cap’ wins this duel,

Having a little more wit than Norsemen.

(Source: fancydresscostumes.co.uk)

The Politician’s Husband, BBC Two

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If story is to reflect our times it must,

Like satire, allow an ephemeral grain

Without too much concern over the rust

That may take in posterity, the wane

In understanding that may take place.

We all have google now, to quickly find

Robin Cook, Geoffrey Howe, put name to face

& face to deed, & the parallel in mind.

In its casual deployment of detail

This achieves a verisimilitude

Somewhat above ‘House of Cards’, which fails

(both versions), to adopt the attitude

That what the audience does not know

It can intuit, no need for blow-by-blow.

(Source: thecolemanexperience.wordpress.com)

Doctor Who: ‘Hide’, BBC One

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Now there are things that don’t work at all here –

That the TARDIS can’t but then can go to

The pocket world, the convenient seer’s

Variable pain capacity – but who

Cares, frankly? For the successive week

Has provided a first twenty my child

Self would have found nearly unbearably

Scary. He couldn’t handle a ghost, that mild

Kid. There was a Guy Fawkes tale in a Cub

Scout Annual that meant his Dad had to

Hold his hand to sleep one Christmas night;

A jamboree ‘Monster Squad’ some poor schlub

Of a Kaa had to talk him down from. Just a boo

Set his mind running round in lack of light. 

(Source: ilovemonsterbash.blogspot.co.uk)

Margaret Thatcher’s Funeral, BBC One

Did we applaud Diana as her hearse

Went down The Mall? The holding of hats

In solemn thanks, the turning of backs

In silent thanks, they work to show the corpse

Respect &/or protest against her years

Of demolition; but applause? Did we clap

Churchill’s cortege? An odd elegy that

Is surely too simply misread – per-verse.

I’ve held my peace throughout the week,

More or less, as I typed on I listened,

Occasionally stopping off to retweet

Today’s unemployment figures: risen.

As the funeral gives way to ‘Bargain Hunt’,

I think of the ways I’ll miss the Iron Lady.

(Source: Flickr / cdfzer)

Endeavour, ITV1

In sunny meadows, the three variations

On the franchise stroll: Morse, Lewis & Morse

Jr., fresh-faced Endeavour. ‘Of course’,

Says Morse, ‘I established our conventions’.

‘Aye, but I brought them to perfection,’

Says the Sergeant. ‘No traipsing far abroad,

No Venice or Aussie trip. ‘Twas all Oxford

All the time: always lawns, with the addition

Of a soap element you briefly tried

But I made work.’ ‘True,’ says the youth, ‘but I

Benefit from the production team’s

Twenty-year honing of our single tale.

While we all are great I would allege

These period frocks give me the edge.’

(Source: 500px.com)